Friday, August 7, 2009

A Super Typhoon

It's been more than 2 years now since the onset of my worst nightmare. Bell's Palsy struck me right in the face (or at least half of it) last December 1, 2006, exactly 1 month after having braces.

I was on night duty when I felt something weird. I looked in the mirror to check for something unusual but there was none.

On arrival at home, I immediately changed clothes and it was when I was brushing my teeth that I noticed that I was spitting water on the side. Fear came to me as I am not aware of what was happening. Right after, I can feel something pulling on the left side of my face.

As I woke up the next morning, I was crying to see my face assymetrical as the right side drooped down and lost its muscle tone.

The doctors prescribed Vitamin B complex and steroids which only aggravated my feeling of depression because steroid therapy has disfiguring side effects of its own.

I hated waking up everyday and go to class because of the fear of embarrassment and being on the center of attention. But my parents insisted and reasoned that graduation is only 3 months away. I spent Christmas vacation sleeping to let time fly.

As classes resumed alas my fears came true. Everywhere I go, I see someone staring at me. Classmates and friends kept asking what's wrong with me until it got irritating to simply answer those questions. Also, it was only then that I realized that people often forget that IT'S RUDE TO STARE at people. I wanted to melt during those times or to just disappear in a blink. That experience indeed was a big blow to my self confidence and I consider it as a super typhoon of my life.

What's even more frustrating is that the college ALMOST did not allow my absences to be excused. Mr ***** even said
"Bakit mo kasi tinapat yung check-up mo sa duty?", and in my mind I was yelling "WT*! Tinatimingan pa ba dapat yun?". When one is sick, doesn't he or she want or is at least entitled to have medical attention immediately?

Everyone in my batch then was already excited for the upcoming graduation and was busy planning for the next chapter of their lives while mine stopped with my face hiding under the darkness of Bell's.

Time passed and recovery took place but the emotional side was more difficult to heal. But as some people say, "When you're down, there's no way but up". Thus with the help family, friends and a special someone, I'm back and alive again.. Smiling..Ü